Friday, November 18, 2011

The Friesen's House of Payne

Monday, November 7, 2011

The Six Legged Beast Is In The Hosue

Note to Reader: I'm cleaning house in my blog. This is a draft I found that I had written 9/18/11.  It's out of place here but I'm publishing it anyway.

Our house is now completely quiet only interrupted by our killer dogs barking at a cat lurking in our yard.  It's a jungle out there, or at least you would think so hearing those beasts with their deadly barking and carrying on.  The combined weight of the dogs is less than 20 pounds so they're just showing off for me.  

One really strange thing has been their reactions to this new 6 legged creature in their house.  They're still a little scared of the walker.  When I first got home they acted really funny.  I think they thought I had died.  They were present at "the scene" and saw all the evidence of a traumatic event.  They greeted me timidly when I got home.  The first time I got up to walk with the walker with them present, I was in quite a bit of pain and was kind of vocally expressive.   They were standing on a chair dead still, eyes as big as saucers, heads cocked just blankly staring at me.  I wish I had taken a picture.  The love and concern on their faces melted my heart.  They've been so good around me--so careful not to step on the broken leg. We take lots of cuddly naps together.

A Prayer for You

Next Sunday morning my friend Susan and I are reciting the following passage (from memory!) at church.  We're in a sermon series on Ephesians and our pastor challenged us to learn the entire book.  We as a body are breaking it down and each learning a section...then we can all say we've memorized the book by proxy.  This is a prayer for the Ephesians but I consider it a prayer for me and a prayer for my children and friends and for anyone who needs prayer.  If you put a name in place of the bold words,  that's a personal prayer.  I find it a very meaningful way to pray.  It's helped me through some very trying "mommy moments".

Ephesians 3:14-21
New International Version (NIV)
A Prayer for the Ephesians
 14 For this reason I kneel before the Father, 15 from whom every family in heaven and on earth derives its name. 16 I pray that out of his glorious riches he may strengthen you with power through his Spirit in your inner being, 17 so that Christ may dwell in your heart(s) through faith. And I pray that you, being rooted and established in love, 18 may have power, together with all the Lord’s holy people, to grasp how wide and long and high and deep is the love of Christ, 19 and to know this love that surpasses knowledge—that you may be filled to the measure of all the fullness of God. 20 Now to him who is able to do immeasurably more than all we ask or imagine, according to his power that is at work within us, 21 to him be glory in the church and in Christ Jesus throughout all generations, for ever and ever!       Amen.

Musings on Pain

I've been recuperating from my failed flight lesson for two months now.  It seems like two years.  It's really been a l-o-n-g ordeal.  But, on the other hand, all I have to do is look out my back patio door and see my landing pad and it all comes rushing in like it was yesterday.  There have been so many emotional ups and downs during this time.  Any little change feels like I'm making a lot of progress but when I start feeling like I'm going backwards I remember all the initial pain and get scared.  Will I always have pain?  I know the answer to this question all too well.  I was always in pain even before my body broke to bits.  But that was a dull, always present pain scattered around various places in my body.  The pain associated with my injuries now is very local and it stabs and burns and throbs.  I guess it's worse than my "regular" pain because my other aches and pains are taking a backseat.  Weird, but it's my body's way of coping.  It's a good thing because with everything shouting and yelling at me I wouldn't be able to get out of bed!  No kidding!

I find myself complaining a lot.  I moan and groan and holler sometimes.  I guess it's more than sometimes because while Dave and the dogs at first were very concerned and shaken by all the noise, they now they just continue going along, doing their own business and ignore it.  That's not to say they are without compassion, they're just used to it by now.  The worst pain is connected to my broken hip.  The rod placement down the side of my femur really is hurting.  I guess the point is to have the bone grow around it and make it all part of my anatomy.  The screws up top hold my femur to the hip joint.  Since I've been working with PT that area has really woken up and is not pleased.  It's really sensitive to touch (or the foot of an 8# pound puppy).  

But, the knee aches, too.  I'm supposed to be aggressive when I try to bend it.  I have gone from a 40 degree bend to an 82 degree bend in a couple of weeks so it is stretching but it is the strangest feeling.  I can feel the ligament over the patella stretch like a big rubber band (which is what it is, I guess) and then when it's gone as far as it can it just stops--frozen, done.  There are ways to stretch it further and by keeping up with exercises it becomes easier.  Did I just say "easier"?  That word never really belongs in a paragraph about physical therapy!  It becomes less annoyingly painful.  How's that?

My friends happily take me to therapy and I love staying in touch with them during that brief time.  It's good to get out of the house, too.  I really think that my therapers are marvelous and are helping me a lot.  They're the ones who I need right now.  I learn so much from each session and the environment is so friendly that we therapees learn from each other, too.

Also, even at this late date as I reflect on my injuries I'm still very thankful for them.  It could have been so much worse.  When I look at the scar on my left leg I remember that it came so close to the bone.  So much more damage could have happened to my foot and being my "good" foot, I need it at 100 percent!  My other injuries will heal and that right leg will be a bit more lame than before but I'll still be able to get around by myself.  That's important.  I'm not sure how the pain situation will level out but that's something that can be dealt with, too.  All in all, when I complain it's just the pain talking.  That's what I tell Dave when I snap at him but that doesn't really make him feel better.  I just want to be thankful for my spared life and for Dave's presence here and his willingness to do things for me that he'd rather not have to do.  We're getting to the age where it's hard enough taking care of ourselves.  As his Parkinson's Disease progresses we realize that someday I may be taking care of him.  We're trying to be brave and face those facts and prepare ourselves.  But in the meantime, we're going to be even more diligent in taking care of ourselves.