I'm needed

I can become so self-absorbed that I begin to think that no one needs me. I have pity parties a lot, but don't want anyone to know that about me.  It's a sense of pride that keeps me strong on the outside wven though I'm crumbling on the inside.  

I've been helping a friend negotiate her way through a new cancer diagnosis and chemotherapy.  As a nurse I've faced these issues hundreds of times but now it's different.  Seeing a good friend suffer with something so heavy breaks my heart.  I'm learning a lot.  One important thing is to be able to shut my mouth and listen.  I have to allow her to  express herself in a safe place.  I want to be the kind of person who can do that.  I also want to be needed.  I want to make a difference in a positive way

Life Happens

I'm sitting here in my life wondering where it went.  A good friend would always say, "Life is what happens to you when you have other plans."  Ain't that the truth??  My plans for "my life" have rarely gone as I "planned".   I wonder why that is.  I'm a reasonably intelligent, educated woman who has done a lot of interesting things but my life has really changed over the past few years.  I've become a hermit due to a lot of medical issues and I really need to branch out.  I guess the best way to do that is publicly so I can't run and hide!